There are some love stories that can only be told by certain people. The twisted and beautiful love story in Skullcrusher Mountain could only be told by Jonathan Coulton. An evil super-villainous madman kidnaps the object of his desire and whisks her away to his secret lair and attempts to woo her by making a half-monkey half-pony monster, plying her with wine, and pointing out that the mountain is covered with hungry wolves. The evil genius dreams of taking his love away on a trip under the ocean while his henchmen set the atmosphere on fire. Overall, a fairly standard tale of boy meets girl, boy kidnaps girl, boy makes horrible mutated monster for girl, and boy's army of demented followers ends life on Earth. Pretty boring really. But in Coulton's hands this classic tale of romance really comes to life.
Undead life. Wait, no, that's another song.
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